It Must Be Spring

Spring. Actual results may vary.

I think Spring officially arrived for me today.

It was a nice, warm day here in Statlerland, so I decided to take a bit of time out by having a walk around a particularly well-known lake. I was thoroughly enjoying myself, walking along with sun beaming and headphones blasting, when I was suddenly swooped by a magpie. Because I was listening to my music, I didn't realise what had happened until the bird came back for it's second attempt. Naturally, I ducked, but the magpie ripped what must have been a small strand of hair out of my scalp, either with it's beak, or grabbing it with it's feet. Quite frankly, I didn't see, I was out of there in a shot!

The second time I found Spring was late this afternoon, when the local kids started playing in the street again. Not something I've been looking forward to, considering the kids only have one volume setting AND IT'S NOT A QUIET ONE. Add the fact that I went spare at a neighbour last year for leaving her two-year-old unattended in the street (I nearly backed over the poor kid with my car), thus making me your friendly local Evil Incarnate ("Avert your eyes, children!"), and I know soon enough my stress ball will need replacing.

Sigh.

At least it will be summer soon. I'm sure there are other good points I'm missing, but I can't find them right now.

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• Statler